If You had to Choose…
What would you pick, happiness or a fulfilling life?
Asked that question, I would respond with one or two of my own.
Why can’t I have both? They’re both trick questions, not that I am trying to fool you, but that they are simply tricky.
Another question might be, aren’t they the same thing?
Yes, but not always at the same time.
You’ve noticed that life has it’s ups and downs. Going through the “downs” may not appear to contribute to happiness. It’s still possible that they would contribute to a fulfilling life.
This is where some Bozo would say, “Well you have to have the downs in order to have the ups.” And that may be true to a degree, but it’s not what I’m talking about.
Are You Thoroughly Confused?
There are numerous books available lately on the subject of happiness. As I see it, the attainment of that state of happiness is elusive, at best. Todd Kashdan, author of Curious?
True, not true, I am not sure. If you ask people, I think it is at least as likely, maybe moreso, that people will report being unhappy.
But what about having a fulfilling life? That may be different.
The secret to a fulfilling life is to know the path or valued direction you want to follow. The discovery to that path is “choosing” what in life you will make important.
Then to follow the path, through all the ups and downs.
The name of the path is “value-ing.” It comes down to a simple question…
What do you want in your life? Long term. What do you really want?
When we don’t know the answer, then, corny as it seems, the answer is to live the question. If we keep our eyes open, values often find us.
When we do know the path, the challenge is staying the course. Through thick and thin, whether up or down.
Not wanting to sound like a know-it-all – because in reality I know little – this is the perspective from which I see life. And believe me, I have failed my values many times. The beauty of knowing them, though, is that no matter where you are at a given moment, all it takes is a moment of awareness to get back on the path.
Having said that, back to happiness and fulfillment at the same time. It’s looking back on our lives and knowing that, even in hard times, we were able to do the right thing.
The right thing is something only each of us can decide.
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